“He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” - Isaiah 40:29-31 ESV
“God gives power to those who make themselves faint, and strengthens the ones who choose powerlessness. In your youth, you should work until you faint. Be weary. The young should fall exhausted. Those who work for the Lord shall show their strength, they shall climb with perseverance and grasp onto the wings of eagles. They shall run and not mention one iota of weariness. They shall walk and run and scrape by and serve and welcome, and keep running and not faint.” - Isaiah 40:29-31, Helms’ Mixed Up Version
The above quotes, one being the Word of God and the other being a mixed-up performative version of it, were presented to the audience at the 2022 Christian Community Development Conference by Helms Jarrell, an interdisciplinary artist working at the intersection of art, faith, and culture, emphasizing the role of story telling and art to bring people together and bring about change. Working faithfully for social justice, Helms is no stranger to the pressures of performative Christianity and the desire to do more, more, and ever more in an attempt to love her neighbors and follow Christ as an advocate for justice and equity in the Charlotte area. I was struck by Helms’ “Mixed Up Version” of Isaiah 40:29-31, as I resonate so deeply with the pressure to do more, to be more involved, to serve more greatly, often resulting in the creation of a never-ending checklist of to-do’s to check off and move on. As a student at UVa, the pressures to do more, to join another club, to take another class, to obtain a certain GPA, to maintain rich community, to serve, and to lead, all while having fun with a smile on your face, are often enormous. While I find myself sucked into the pressure-cooker of “performancism” on grounds quite often, I find that I quite frequently add to the pressure through my bend towards performative Christianity. I, like Helms, often live out my day-to-day running around trying to do as much as possible and be as much as possible. If I were to be honest with myself, the way I live out my life more often reflects Helms’ “Mixed Up Version” of Isaiah than the true Word of God.
I often believe the lie that to follow Christ means to work until exhaustion, to be weary, to show my own strength, to maintain a smile on my face, and to “walk and run and scrape by and serve and welcome, and keep running and not faint.” In doing so, however, I rob myself of the true freedom, comfort, and joy we have in the truth of Christ, which the true version of Isaiah 40 reminds us. In Christ, I am empowered by the strength of the Lord, I am lifted up when I am weary and exhausted, I walk and do not faint. The key difference between Helms’ (and often my own) version and the Word of God is in who is in control. In Helms’ version, the pressure is on me to do and be all things. I am to pick myself up when I am down, brush off the dirt, and keep running ahead without any help or support. All on my own. Isaiah tells us a different story. The pressure is not on me. The weight of the world is not on me. I am not expected to perform, nor am I expected to make myself faint. I am promised that when I am faint, I will be restored. The Lord will renew my strength when I am weary, I will run and not grow weary and I will walk and not faint. My ability to follow and serve Christ, seeking to love my neighbor, the world, and myself in Christ’s love, is not riding on the amount of organizations I serve with, small groups I sign up for, or times that I open up the Bible. I am enough each and everyday, not for anything I did or said the day prior, nor for anything I will say or do the next day, but because of who I am in the Lord and the unconditional love that is Jesus Christ.
I believe true discipleship begins when we turn away from whatever mixed up performative version we have of what it means to follow Christ and embrace our utter dependence on the Lord. True grace, freedom, hope, and joy is found in the loving embrace of Christ, and Christ alone, whose arms are open wide to all people, no questions asked. The following quote by the theologian, author, and civil rights leader Howard Thurman invites us into this joyful living, where we may truly be alive. He writes, “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” I pray that we all will ask ourselves what makes us come alive, and in humility and grace, resting in our state of dependence on the Lord’s strength, that we will go do it, knowing we are already and forever enough.